Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
