did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
It's never too late to be topless.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
