What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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