rhymes with "ouble enetration"
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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