how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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