Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
