we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
