i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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