Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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