i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
