I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
