it hurts more in the daytime
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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