so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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