im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
either way he was missing a nipple.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
they're like a gay fantastic four
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
