No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Randomize
