Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
And the cops told us we were all naked.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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