So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize
