You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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