there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
