His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
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