Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize