That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
there is glitter all over my balls
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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