So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Randomize
