We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize