I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
This is the high leading the old right now
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize