first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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