ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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