where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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