I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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