i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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