he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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