Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Randomize
