Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
