i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize