I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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