How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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