clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
