what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
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