I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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