ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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