What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
