I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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