that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize