Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize