Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
