I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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