stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
