I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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