matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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