So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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