And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
